ShaunaMarie's Ramblings

About the Writing Process I have barely started a new book and I am so excited to share these characters with you. It doesn’t even have a title yet! Its been a while since I started a new project. I have been in editing hell for so long I forgot about that excitement of getting to know characters and developing the story. Eating breathing sleeping dreaming it all. Really it becomes an obsession and its all you think about. This scenario or that scenario. Your friends don’t want to talk to you because you are only half listening to them, thinking about these people.  I figure the more real they are in my head, the more real they will be to you too. So a little peek? Okay you twisted my arm.  😉 Prologue I raised my hand to knock again. My hands were trembling already. My cock was on full alert as I waited. The lock disengaged, I jumped, actually jumped. No woman had ever made me this nervous and edgy. And she was just a girl. I had to get control of myself or this ...

The past few weeks have been hard. Between the 16th anniversary of my mother's death, I'm sorry but you never get OVER it, you just get used to it. Still, when I published my first book, it was her I wanted to tell so badly. So I planned book two to come out on that anniversary, it was important to me. Because of Mark, it was a day late. He has been heavy on my mind. I have been losing sleep over this guy. Why? Why him? Because of how he made me feel. I realized today that it’s not him, per se, that I miss, but the fantasy of him. The dream he allowed me of what a future with him could have been like. The lovemaking, the talking, the laughing, sharing, loving and touching.  Connecting on a deeper intimate level, that I have not connected on in so many many years.  So thank you for that, thank you. I really do hope you find what you’re looking for and that she deserves you and makes you happy. But it's time for me to let go of the fantasy of us.   Goodbye....

Sunday already. Sometimes life just moves too fast or you just don't quite accomplish all of the things you think you should have, in the given time. I have felt that way on my birthdays frequently. Like I couldn't possibly be a year older because I hadn't done enough to warrant that. What a fool. Time flies whether you do a ton of stuff or sit perfectly still and do absolutely nothing, time stops for no one, no matter how slow or fast we think it's going. I have discovered a few things about myself lately. First, I am not a patient person. I feel like Veruca Salt... I WANT IT NOW!  Just in case you have no idea what that reference means... you can watch it here on YouTube... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRTkCHE1sS4 When I decided it was time for a man in my life, I want it POOF, now. As soon as I find one I like, have an attraction to and feel like they are attracted to me, I want them now. Current guy, Mark. He's a good talker, great communica...

I started this crazy ass journey back in August. I have lost count on how many men I have spoken with, exchanged emails, texted and skyped with, the number is scary honestly. Lots of toads, a few high-quality men, who I managed to intimidate and scare off with my intensity, maybe? I have no idea, one day they just stop talking. I guess it’s a common thread, so what is it exactly that men want? What is it that they expect to happen if they show up like a real man and actually tell you, "Hey it's just not working for me", good luck with your search. What do they think? I guess there are some scary women who would get angry and lash out, if she’s all that, then just walk away, but there are those of us out here who just want to know, so we don’t make the same mistakes the next time. I can usually go over every conversation, ruminate over them actually, and find several dozen reasons someone would find me undesirable. So, news … fuck… Ok so in the last couple weeks I ...

It's been awhile since I updated you on the dating front... well there's not much to say really. The married man is gone, his lame excuse... "You are just too far away." Ok, got the hint, "You just aren't worth the effort." Loud and clear! Met Tall guy. Actually in person. Very nice guy, very very nice. I think too nice really, for me. I am a rotten sexual being and he is... a little sexually repressed I think?  Have no idea with this one, he was falling in love one day, wanting to be the best boyfriend I ever had and dumped me the next (well a few days later. It all happened in the course of a couple of weeks... What the hell is it with me? Again, I would say to the guys out there: Be honest. Be open. We are adults not children. If you can't handle breaking it off with someone with some honesty, then don't date. Maybe its a misunderstanding, miscommunication. After all you are both new to each other. Fuck, give it at least a conversation...

A short story written by a wonderful friend and writer!  Take a read. Free on KU!  It's a really sexy read. Begging Becky Internet dating may be the new dance club scene for hooking up. The best part of dating on the Internet is, wait for it... you don't have to be concerned with how you’re dressed or if you’re dressed. Becoming smutty is verbal and sometimes not so verbal if you’re using a high-quality HD camera. Getting face to face is easy. Becky, young, sexy and beautiful, was desperate. When one is desperate one tends to make very bad, and naughty choices. Becky was no different. Although, Becky’s choices may put her in danger. But when your body calls you to action, more like demands it, what choice do you have? Find someone to share it with who needs it just as bad. Becky hoped to find a partner to help her with her problem... spoiler alert... achieving an orgasm. Would 'Massive' live up to his screen name?  And make Becky drip with anticipation? Hello In...

Ok girls, did you read the previous post, Internet Dating, Rules for Men?  Yeah? Good. All of that applies to you as well. One thing I want to reiterate: keep your knees together. No matter how bad you want him, sex is not what will keep him around. I mean if all you want is to fuck him, then go for it. But if you are truly hoping, be honest with yourself here, for an LTR… do not sleep with him until you know for sure where his head… the one on his shoulders girls… is at in the dating game. Is he just some hustler who wants a one night stand or a week or two of booty calls? If so, send him on his way, you will feel much better about yourself for it. Setting yourself up for the right expectations is the key. I am ashamed I have to say this to any grown woman, but I have heard this a few times from guys and it really bothers me more than I can say. If you are a gold digger, if all you want is a sugar daddy to pay your rent, help you out financially, raise your kids.... damn h...

HEY Guys out there!  I am finding that many of you really love our great big bodies. The rolls, the skin slapping, burying your face between our big thick thighs... My question to you is... Is this a fetish that you want to indulge or are you seriously interested in a relationship with a SS woman? We have issues you need to be ready for, things you can easily prevent. So, here's a little advice. I hope you don't find me too forward or bossy or negative, (all of which I have been accused of). I am just being realistic and honest.  And trying to help all my Supersized sisters out there too, and myself as well.  1.     If you want to make a fat girl weak in the knees, give her attention. Talk to her, tell her how you feel about anything, listen to her, more than likely she will want to hear all about who you are. Be open, if you aren't open to this process, what are you doing here? We are all vulnerable in this development. You don...

What a whirlwind. There truly are a lot of men out there looking, so those of you who think there are no men out there our age (50’s), think again. Back when I was in my 20’s (yesterday, right?) I had a friend in her 50’s. She told me it was the best time of her life. The men were coming out of the woodwork and she loved it.  I remember laughing at her because she was about my size now, back then. Peggy loved those younger men. She was so young at heart and they seemed to fit her personality well.  Bless you, my friend. I still think of you often.  In so many ways she was right. Those young ones came out of the woodwork, but I don’t want a boy. I want a man who knows what he’s doing. Who’s been around the block a time or two. Who understands where he fucked up and won’t make that mistake again. In other words, I want him to come trained. LOL.  I don’t want to train. I’ve met quite a few men, ok not met in person. I haven’t met any of them in person. It never got...

Here is a little something I wrote as a free write for an assignment.  It’s fiction people! A friend from work had invited me to lunch at a new restaurant in town. I was excited, it sounded like a wonderful place to take my wife on our fifth anniversary the following week. Five years was one of those milestone years, at least it felt that way. We had been connecting on a deeper level over the last year and things were perfect, so I was anxious to spend some time showing Kate just how much she was loved and appreciated in every way. The hostess was walking me through the restaurant to the table where my co-workers sat talking and laughing. They were a lively group. I sat in one of the open chairs facing out into the restaurant, my favorite way to observe people. I found it amazing how comfortable people could be in the middle of a restaurant for everyone to see. Like in a car, people act like they are alone and act as if they are unobserved. Best time to watch people. A...

For some crazy reason, I am extremely attracted to Libra men. I have three exs, best friend, brother, father and have been out with many others. The last one was right on the cusp, but, claims Scorpio. He's a Libra, trust me. Libra's are my kryptonite. They are charming and broody and funny and they love to philosophize, examine the wrongs of the world. They're sensitive and emotional and just overall sweet men. BUT and that is a big BUT, they hurt me every time. They break my heart, aren't ready to commit or aren't interested in committing to me. Twice I have been told, "I'm sorry but I am marrying someone else."  One of them after six years of a tumultuous relationship. Recently, I was drawn to a man. He was attractive, intelligent, very charming, and seemingly, into me. I asked his birthday, sure enough, Libra. I knew it before he even told me. I said to him. "I'm so sorry. We can't talk anymore." "Why?" he asked....

I’ve had many fresh starts lately. Some good, some bad, some worked, some didn’t. This blog is new, a way for me to unleash my thoughts out into the world and share parts of myself with you. I named this, Ramblings because I tend to purge my thoughts and then end up coming full circle, hopefully with a conclusion. But we know that doesn’t always happen. Sometimes it just takes further thought. I’ve had a lot of realizations in the last few months. I’ve always kind of been a loner, it’s what makes me write. I like people, just not as much as I used to. I enjoy writing because, guess what, I get to control the characters and what they say and do. Real people just don't seem to cooperate like they do in our heads. But where is the learning and excitement in that? It's the surprises in life that make us think and give us new fodder to consider. Fall is coming and it’s my favorite time of year to spend time cuddling by a fire, talking, sipping hot chocolate, and kissing...